Monday, March 19, 2007

Parents of the Year

First-Grader Brings Crack Cocaine to Show-and-Tell
SHREVEPORT, La. — A 20-year-old Shreveport woman has been arrested after her first-grade son brought a rock of crack cocaine to school for show-and-tell.

Police were especially disturbed by the child's understanding of crack cocaine. They said he seemed so accustomed to the highly addictive drug that he thought there was nothing wrong with bringing it to school.

Police did not release the name of the school, saying they are still investigating.

Lachristie Thomas was booked on a charge of improper child supervision, a misdemeanor.

Police say the six-year-old was placed in foster care.

Parents Help Launch Daughter's Budding Porn Career
Sunny Lee has some really supportive parents.

The 20-something gal has made a name for herself as the "Shirley Temple of Porn," thanks in large part to the help of her loving parents, ABC News reports.

Lee (not her real name) still lives at home with her parents, Mike and Shelby, who help her in every aspect of the business - from helping her create a doppelganger sex doll to bagging her dirty underwear for sale online.

"We're not kinky parents," Mike insists to ABC News.

[…] "She does her thing, safely, in a good environment, and I don't worry about that," Mike said. "When she comes back home, I just ask her how her date was."

“Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me; but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened round his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.” (Mat 18:5-6, RSV)

That’s it! I’ve figured out what’s wrong with society. What with industrialization, automation, and mechanical processing of our foods, we don’t have enough millstones! Someone needs to set up mass production of millstones and we can start getting rid of these people! Wait – wouldn’t work – the EPA would be all over us for tossing people into the sea and contaminating the reef.